Seesaw days

Lately life has teetered up and down, up and down, up and down. Up is when I have a handle on this gig I have as wife, mommy x4, teacher, sister, daughter, aunt.... thing that is me. Down is when one, some or all of the subcategories of "me" throws me curve balls. Have things really been as busy as I feel like they are or do I make it worse than it is by feelings of guilt when I'm ignoring one subcategory for another?
Jackson turned 9 last Thursday. 9. (long sigh) We had a little surprise party at this rock climbing place. It had my little man's name written ALL over it. I'll post some pictures soon (during my next teeter up).
Pre-School ends this week. Bitter-sweet as usual. I'll miss having my pre-schoolers as a part of my everyday. They really do bless me. They give me a feeling of completion at the end of every school session. I wish I could be a fly on the wall of each of their Kindergarten classrooms. I'd cheer them on when they do their tasks with confidence or I'd urge them to do their best when I can see that they aren't:) I wish I could have a little chat with each of their teachers to come. I'd tell them what I've taken the time to learn about them in the 1 to 2 years that they've been "mine". I'd share what has worked with each of them and what hasn't. Wouldn't that be great if they could just cut out the whole "getting to know each other" phase and just get right down to the spongy like learning that they are so good at? On the sweet side, I'm looking forward to time off with my little lovies at home. I miss having them all to myself without my mind multi-tasking a hundred other thoughts or mentally listing everything I need to get to. They deserve some good R & R with their mommy. I'm looking forward to lazy days by the pool and snack time at Tastee Freeze. I can't wait to smell that all too familiar scent of musty old books that only the combination of summertime and our local summer reading program at the library can bring. I love that smell almost as much as the smell of a classroom packed with new crayons (crayola only) waiting for a new school year to begin. MMmmmm crayons.
Anyhoo, YEAH for summer vacation with my little lovies.
Did I mention that Owen and Jackson had a nearly serious bicycle wreck on Jackson's bday? Owen took a little trip with Daddy to the ER for x-rays of his leg and foot. No breaks just bruising. Thank you Jesus. Good thing I'm not in this mommy gig all alone. He loves them even more than I do. He holds their hearts in His hands. Who am I that he has trusted HIS little lovies to me? Lord, give me peace of mind. Drain every bit of stress and confusion from me. Consume every nook and cranny of my thoughts...let them be your thoughts and let me take actions that mirror you and not me.